=( (Friday, July 09, 2004 / 5:54 AM)
Dear diary,
This week is the exam week and for most of the papers, i did not really manage to complete everything and i dunno why during wednesday when i was going through my emaths question, i cried. I dunno why i cried, maybe its because i can't even complete a simple emaths question, maybe its because i missed him too much, maybe i hate myself for losing this friendship between me and him, maybe its because i feels that no one really cares for me or maybe it because the gap between my friends and i are getting bigger and bigger...there's just too many maybe in my mind...i simply just hate this kind of feelings. How i wish i am the one he will think about everytime...how i wish i am the one he will call up before he goes to bed...how i wish i am the one he will always cares for..how i wish i am the one who can be with him no matter how elated or how depress he is but i know all this are just my wish which will not come true for now or in the future. Don't worry, i am fine, i will still learn to be strong and independent even if i don't heard from him anymore. I will try not to cry anymore at nights when i think of him and how happy he is with his gf now =) I simply just hate myself for loving you...
