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once upon a nut-job

I hold on to my own belief.

desperate housewives

just love me day by day

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Dear diary,

i soo dislike my behaviour yesterday..freak!
it was school in da morning and shopping with sheena in da afternoon
managed to only get myself a white top after browsing through most shops for the 2nd time!
i'm so picky when it comes to buying of clothes
maybe that explains why everyone can get so much stuff while i only manage to get 1 top
bought another top at topshop but it's sleeveless
gotta work hard to shake off the fats on my arm before i can wear that out
accompanied sheena for dinner at V8 movie cafe, i only drank a cup of ice choco
afterwhich i met up with him at cine for dinner
had da usual chicken cheesey baked rice, my fav ((:
accompanied him to topman where he got himself 2 tops
sat outside taka and we really chatted & played happily
how i wish we were like this in da past...
looking at him, i can't help but to feel all so emo
and when he insists on seeing me board the bus
i went mad and gave him serious attidues
dumping my stuff onto the floor and drain
with that...tears rolled down and i confessed my weakness to him
told him how did those 2 months plus passed by
how much i suffered...how i cried almost everynight
how hurt i was when he's out having fun with his new girl
i told him almost everything and that got me thinking
am i trying to gain pity from him to make him take me back?
i don't know but one thing's for sure...
even though i cried, the hurt wasn't as bad as it used to be
i don't really understand what i want...
on one hand, i'm sooo hating him but on the other, i still wanna meet him
when can i ever give up?
sooo sick of breaking up, maybe finding the one for a lifetime will be much happier?